varostreamA podcast that explains how everything is psychology. Even your 20s. New episodes every Friday! For business enquires please email thepsychologyofyour20steam@unitedtalent.com New merchandise here: https://the-psychology-of-your-20s.myshopify.com/
Episodes
474. How I transformed my relationship with exercise
Content note: This episode includes discussions of exercise, dieting, weight loss and body image. How do you learn to love exercise when it has always felt like punishment? In today’s more personal episode, I’m sharing how I completely changed my relationship with movement over the past three years, from barely moving to running half marathons and genuinely enjoying the gym. Watch on Netflix: HERE We discuss: Why enjoyment became more important than discipline Starting slowly and letting yourself stop How I focused on progress that wasn't attached to my appearance Removing comparison from your fitness journey My running tips Why taking a break doesn’t mean having to start all over again Happy listening! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:20473. The psychology of clubbing
Why does dancing in a crowd feel so good? What is the emotional allure of the dance floor, the club scene, the music? Today, we’re exploring the psychology of clubbing, from the physiological rush of a beat drop to the role it plays in making the most of our 20s. Watch on Netflix: HERE We discuss: How music and dance influence our mood Collective effervescence: the feeling of being part of something bigger Why clubs feel freeing for some and overwhelming for others Alcohol, inhibition and “hangxiety” Clubbing as a coming-of-age ritual FOMO, nostalgia and why our relationship with nightlife changes Happy listening! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:36472. What ACTUALLY makes people compatible?
Is a 'spark' all that it takes to be compatible in the long-term? What about sharing the same interests, personality or sense of humour? Or is it something more deep and intangible? In today’s episode, we explore what ACTUALLY makes two people right for each other, and why the things that draw us together aren’t always the things that keep us together. Watch on Netflix: HERE We discuss: Chemistry versus long-term compatibility Why shared values matter more than shared hobbies The importance of feeling understood, appreciated and responded to (i.e the Gottman's theory of responsiveness) How the belief in soulmates can shape your relationship The Four Horsemen that erode connection What an argument can reveal about your future together Whether you’re dating someone new or reflecting on a long-term relationship, this episode explores what it means to build a love that lasts, through change, conflict and the thousands of little choices we make along the way. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
44:32471. The psychology of weddings
Why is there so much pressure for your wedding to be the best day of your life? And what happens when that pressure gets in the way of actually enjoying it? Today, we’re unpacking the psychology of weddings: the expectations, money, family dynamics and friendship tensions that come with saying “I do”. Watch on Netflix: HERE We explore: Why the “perfect wedding” can leave us feeling disappointed How weddings became such extravagant events Social media, comparison and the pressure to spend more The surprising relationship between wedding spending and divorce Why weddings can expose cracks in our friendships The psychology of elopements ... Whether you’re planning a wedding, attending your sixth this year or wondering whether to skip the whole thing, let’s talk about keeping the celebration from overshadowing the relationship. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:11470. Are the love languages a big myth?
Do you really have a love language? And does learning your partner’s actually make your relationship better? In this bonus episode of our debunking psychology series, we unpack the truth behind one of the most popular ideas in modern dating. We explore: Where the five love languages came from and their religious roots The controversial advice in Gary Chapman’s original book What the research actually says about love languages and relationship satisfaction Why lasting love might need a “balanced diet” of affection Partner responsiveness and what it means to feel understood, valued and cared for Find all episodes of DEBUNKING PSYCHOLOGY: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
26:48469. The psychology of embarrassment
We blush, we look away, we replay the moment for hours (or years) after it happened, becoming convinced that everyone noticed far more than they probably did. Embarrassment is an interesting and complex emotion, but it can help us recognise social expectations and communicate how our behaviour affects others. Watch on Netflix: HERE We explore: • When we first develop the capacity to feel embarrassed • Why we blush and the role of embarrassment in trust • Why some of us feel embarrassment more than others • The role of rumination • The psychological and social role of embarrassment • How we can form a better relationship with it Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Fa0025403 https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/european-psychiatry/article/not-intended-still-embarrassed-social-anxiety-is-related-to-increased-levels-of-embarrassment-in-response-to-unintentional-social-norm-violations/F4143AB3B88D41FB18F9962696A77151 https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/desc.70024 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:45468. The psychology of brain fog
Brain fog is so much more than just feeling tired. It's that frustrating feeling of knowing what you want to say or do, but your brain simply won't cooperate. And whilst it's incredibly common, we're only just beginning to understand what actually causes it. Watch on Netflix: HERE In today's episode, we're breaking down the fascinating new research behind brain fog, including: The three main causes of brain fog, from physical depletion to cognitive overload and neurological disruption Why chronic stress, anxiety and mental load can leave your brain feeling exhausted The surprising links between brain fog, inflammation, long COVID and gut health Why women may be more susceptible to brain fog The science of sleep, nutrition and the brain's natural cleaning system What actually helps clear brain fog, beyond just drinking more water and getting more rest Extra links: Brain fog and trauma: HERE Brain fog and ADHD: HERE Brain fog and food: HERE The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:36467. The psychology of the cab theory
Does the taxi cab theory actually explain why some people suddenly become ready to settle down, or is it just another dating myth? In this episode, we’re breaking down the psychology behind the infamous, Sex and The City taxi cab theory and asking whether timing really can determine who we end up with. We explore commitment readiness, the social clock, why our relationship priorities change as we age, and the painful psychology of watching someone give their next partner everything they refused to give you. Watch on Netflix: HERE We discuss: • The psychology behind the taxi cab theory • Why someone can suddenly become “ready” for commitment • The foster girlfriend phenomenon • Why timing matters, but compatibility matters more • How to tell when someone is genuinely serious about you • Why waiting for someone’s “light to switch on” can keep you stuck Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:22466. How your environment programs your behaviour (and how to deprogram yourself)
How much of your behaviour is really “you” - and how much has been shaped by the environments around you? In this episode, we explore how childhood, relationships, social expectations, habits and physical spaces can influence the way we think, feel and behave. From nervous-system responses and beliefs about what is possible for us, to the people we pursue, the habits we repeat and the versions of ourselves that present in different places, we look at the psychology of how environments programme our behaviour. Watch on Netflix: HERE We explore: ● What our ‘environment’ can include ● Impacts of childhood experiences on our nervous system ● Where our belief of what it possible or attainable comes from ● How relational environments shape our pursuit of love ● How our environment shapes our habits ● The impact of our physical environment on our personalities Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1111/j.1467-9280.2009.02309.x https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2017-33544-001 https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.883795/full https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2006-08705-013 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:54465. The psychology of the placebo effect
In this bonus episode, we’re looking at the placebo effect - what it is, how it became an important part of medical research, and why an inactive treatment can sometimes produce genuine changes how we feel, and what this tells us about the relationship between the brain, body and experience of receiving care. The FULL Debunking Psychology playlist: HERE We explore: • How placebos became an important part of scientific research • Some of the earliest placebo experiments • Why our expectations can change the way we experience symptoms • Whether the placebo effect produces real, biological changes • Why the ritual of receiving care may itself influence how we feel • Whether placebo effects represent genuine, lasting change Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
32:30464. The psychology of cults
From abusive MLM’s and wellness programs to doomsday sects and UFO religions, we’re all fascinated by cults. Their mystery offers us a way to explore the darkest recesses of human behaviour, while remaining seemingly out of their reach. But how do we actually define a cult? Watch on Netflix: HERE In this episode, we look at popular examples of cults, understand how they’re organised and recruit followers, and examine what makes some people so vulnerable to joining. We unpack: • How a cult is defined, featuring the BITE model of authoritarian control • What makes cult leaders so distinctive - and dangerous • The (often surprising) tactics cults will employ to get people to join • How people behave during and in the aftermath of leaving a cult • Why there are cults all around us today, and people are still drawn to them Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
56:22463. The 5 reasons you’re not as behind as you think
In our 20s, we’re all vulnerable to feeling that we’re falling behind. Whether it be chasing the perfect job, relationship, friends, living situation, trip abroad, or something else, we’re led to believe that there’s a certain window of time that we should be achieving certain milestones within. In this episode, we unpack: • Why social media makes us compare ourselves with ‘the best’ • The figures behind what people in their 20s really have - and don’t • How milestone anxiety and the social clock make us panic • How we can reframe envy as a useful compass • Why life circumstances mean we might have a different ‘starting line’ to other people • Why you’re not delulu - things really are getting harder! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/40888380/ https://www.forbes.com/advisor/uk/savings/average-savings-by-age-in-uk/ https://jessup.edu/blog/cultural-impact/why-do-adults-adhere-to-a-social-clock/#:~:text=Social%20psychologist%20Bernice%20Neugarten%20identified,purchase%20a%20home%2C%20and%20retire The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
48:28462. The truth about the Stanford Prison Experiment
The Stanford Prison Experiment is one of the most famous studies in psychology, but also one of the most controversial. In this bonus episode, we look at what actually happened in the basement of Stanford University in 1971. We explore: The landscape of psychological research at the time of the study How participants were selected and assigned roles The theatrical procedure of the study The unexpected outcomes and why it was stopped early Ethical lessons around consent and researcher responsibility Why the study is so influential to our understanding of institutions, power and authority The Debunking Psychology series: HERE Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: http://pdf.prisonexp.org/ijcp1973.pdf https://scholarship.richmond.edu/heroism-science/vol10/iss1/5/ https://gen.medium.com/the-lifespan-of-a-lie-d869212b1f62 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
29:05461. 10 things I NEEDED 21 year old me to know
If I could sit down with my 21-year-old self, there are a few things I would definitely want to say. Today, I'm going to say them, like 'don't even THINK about moving in with that guy, use your savings account, care less about grades' and a few more. I also asked you guys, the listeners, about your biggest regrets from your early 20s so we can all learn from each other (how nice is that). Watch on Netflix: HERE We discuss: Why the right relationship should expand your life, not shrink it Why you shouldn’t rush into adulthood Financial avoidance and learning to actually save Why audacity can matter just as much as hard work Caring less about grades and more about experience Why nobody can tell you exactly how to live your 20s Happy listening and drop yours below! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
37:59460. The psychology of 'good girl' syndrome
Many of us are conditioned to believe that being described as kind, nice, accommodating and generous are the key to overall happiness. But when these traits veer into Good Girl Syndrome, we can be left with a pathological need to please others, be hypervigilant towards others’ emotions, and ultimately suppress how we really feel. In this episode, we explore the origins of Good Girl Syndrome, understand the mental and physical cost of emotional suppression, and learn how to challenge this early social conditioning. Watch on Netflix: HERE We unpack: Why women are particularly vulnerable to Good Girl Syndrome How trying to be liked shows up personally and professionally The link between a high score on the Silencing the Self Scale and depression Why it can be harder to break Good Girl habits as we get older The ways we can challenge Good Girl Syndrome traits Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://reachlink.com/advice/general/good-girl-syndrome-why-compliance-destroys-mental-health/ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/a34642791/good-girl-complex/ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/362662346_Appendix_A_The_Silencing_the_Self_Scale The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
44:16459. I'm so tired of being ambitious
Ambition feels like my entire personality and I'm trying to fix that. Who are we beyond our ambition? In a world that only cares about success, output and productivity, what do we feel like we'll lose when we slow down? Watch on Netflix: HERE In this episode I explore: The psychology of highly ambitious people The lies that ambition tells us How ambition steals your joy How to value yourself beyond your output What matters more than ambition The way to slow ambition and why it builds more If you can relate, this is the episode for you! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
33:14458. Can embracing stress actually help us?
Stress has a reputation for burning us out, torching our relationships and even causing our lives to end prematurely. But not all stress is created equal. In this episode, we explore the difference between eustress - good stress - and distress, understand why our experience of stress is rooted in our perception of it, and understand how we can harness stress as a powerful force for motivation, energy and well-being. Watch on Netflix: HERE We unpack: • The difference between eustress - good stress - and distress • Why avoiding stress can actually cause cognitive decline • The dangers of too much stress on our bodies and minds • The Yerkes-Dodson law and the ‘sweet spot’ of stress • How we can reframe our approach to stress to create our own ‘biology of courage’ Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcGyVTAoXEU&vl=en https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8384975/ https://www.healthline.com/health/yerkes-dodson-law The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
36:38457. The psychology of 'false' memories
We treat our memories like a reliable recording of the past. We remember what happened, how we felt, where we were, and what was said. But what if our account is more like a subjective recollection of events? In this episode, we explore the concept of false memories – how they form, why this matters in our everyday lives, and their more serious potential impacts. We explore: • The cognitive mechanisms behind false memories • The misinformation effect and the car crash study • Why our memories are open to imagination, repetition and social influence • Potential consequences of false memories in news reporting and eyewitness testimony • The importance of ethical therapeutic practices and memory Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://innocenceproject.org/dna-exonerations-in-the-united-states/ https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/memory-mind-and-media/article/fake-memories-a-metaanalysis-on-the-effect-of-fake-news-on-the-creation-of-false-memories-and-false-beliefs/B6A66A305AFD6724E1C1C56A68BB5CF2 https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0021-9010.83.3.360 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0022537174800113?via%3Dihub https://link.springer.com/article/10.3758/BF03196174 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
30:28456. Why does feeling sad sometimes feel so good?
Why does feeling sad sometimes feel... so good? Whether it’s putting on the saddest song you know, rewatching a movie that always makes you cry, indulging in a little self-pity or finally letting yourself have a good sob, there is something strangely satisfying about sadness. And psychology may be able to explain why. In this episode, we explore the surprising psychological value of sadness, including: Why sadness can sometimes feel pleasurable The psychology of sad songs and sad movies The tragedy paradox Why a good cry can feel so cathartic Emotional suppression and why it exhausts us Hedonic adaptation and why happiness loses its intensity The surprising appeal of self-pity Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
31:50455. Why does time start flying in our 20s?
It’s a known fact that time moves faster as we get older, but what does this really mean, and can we slow it down? In this episode, we’re going to try to make sense of why flies as we enter our 20s - from memory, to novelty, eye movements and the effects of COVID. Watch on Netflix: HERE We explore: Different types of time: measured vs. perceived What makes time feel fast and slow? The effect of the pandemic The relationship between time and age How social media is making time go faster The 4 ways we can feel like we have more time Happy listening! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
41:03454. The oedipus complex
The Oedipus complex is one of Freud’s most renowned and shocking ideas. In this episode, we dive into the origins of the theory and whether anything really remains once its gendered assumptions and controversial sexual claims are stripped away. We explore: - How the Greek tragedy of Oedipus inspired Freud’s theory - What Freud meant by unconscious childhood desire and parental rivalry - The importance of the phallic stage - How Freud believed it was resolved - and what fixation was thought to mean for adulthood - His problematic gendered ideas - The scientific and ethical problems surrounding the theory - How modern psychoanalysis has reinterpreted Oedipal ideas Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://lacanianworksexchange.net/wp-content/uploads/2023/05/19260101-The-Flight-from-Womanhood-The-Masculinity-Complex-in-Women-as-Viewed-by-Men-and-by-Women-Karen-Horney-IJP-7-p324-339.pdf https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1002/j.2167-4086.2004.tb00151.x https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0033-3204.32.4.535 https://www.routledge.com/The-Oedipus-Complex-A-Contemporary-Introduction/Rohleder/p/book/9781032495651 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
31:14453. 7 facts you need to know about your brain
There are a surprising number of myths and misconceptions about the brain, particularly with regards to its development in our 20s. In this episode, we unpack a number of surprising facts and studies about the brain so that we can in turn better understand how to make the most of our 20s. Watch on Netflix: HERE We unpack: • The science of neuroplasticity and how our brain can rewire itself • Why, on a cognitive level, a broken heart may not be so different from a broken arm • How much of our brains we really use (hint - it’s more than 10%!) • The gut-brain axis and why poor gut health can cause depression - not the other way around • Why our brain needs to forget to function properly • The real age our brain stops developing Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
49:35452. How to get better at being alone
The fear of missing out or not seizing every moment are some of the biggest worries we experience in our 20s. However, spending time alone isn’t the same as being lonely or doing nothing - in fact, it’s quite the opposite. In this episode, we explore why we resist being alone - but why learning to do so is psychologically positive, and can even be a superpower. Watch on Netflix: HERE • Why we culturally and socially villainise solitude • How constantly being online interrupts our ability to be truly alone • The creative and emotional benefits of spending time alone • Why our capacity to be alone is a reflection of our overall maturity • How we can embrace the power of solitude Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://spsp.org/news-center/character-context-blog/social-costs-seeking-solitude https://www.ted.com/talks/susan_cain_the_power_of_introverts?language=en https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2025/feb/02/quiet-please-the-remarkable-power-of-silence-for-our-bodies-and-our-minds The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
46:51451. Why you need to stop psychoanalysing the people you date
Dating can bring out the psychologist in us. One delayed reply, one vague comment, and we try to decode someone’s attachment style, childhood wounds, and capacity for commitment. But while psychological language can help us make sense of relationships, it can also become a way to avoid the much harder truth - sometimes we simply don’t know yet. In this episode we look at why overanalysing feels so reassuring, especially when we have been hurt before, and how the search for hidden meaning can distract us from direct communication, being present, and the person actually in front of us. Watch on Netflix: HERE We explore: • The difference between noticing patterns and control rumination • Why dating uncertainty makes labels feel so appealing • Why overanalysing often comes from fear rather than insight • Why this can stop us from being vulnerable ourselves • Why behaviour matters more than the story behind it • How to slow the spiral and regain clarity, communication, and self-trust Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_to_stop_overthinking_your_relationship https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X16300306?via%3Dihub https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0022-3514.75.2.545 https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1996-01742-003 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
52:03450. The psychology of the quarter life reinvention
In this episode, we explore the psychology of the quarter life reinvention: the period that can come after the confusion, uncertainty and identity crisis of our early and mid-20s, when things finally begin to fall into place. We look at how the quarter life crisis can transform us, the stages we move through, and why sometimes everything has to fall apart before we can rebuild a life that feels more like our own. We explore: • The difference between a quarter life crisis and a quarter life reinvention • The ‘locked in’ and ‘locked out’ forms of the quarter life crisis • The four stages of the crisis • The signs that you’re entering your reinvention era • How experimentation, risk taking and new experiences help us rebuild • The role of narrative psychology and rewriting the story you tell about your life • Why learning to tolerate uncertainty may be the key to finally moving forward Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
30:42449. The psychology of your shadow self
What is the shadow self? And how do we meet ours? In today's episode we explore what it means to get curious about the shadow parts of ourselves. We take a grounded look at shadow work - where the idea came from, the layers of our psyche, and how the repressed parts of ourselves show up. We explore: • What Jung meant by the shadow and the persona • How the dark or disowned parts of ourselves can develop • Why anger, neediness, ambition, or confidence can feel uncomfortable to acknowledge • The role of projection, triggers and repeated patterns • How to approach shadow work cautiously and with curiosity Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: The book I spoke about: HERE The YouTube video: HERE The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
33:10448. The psychology of reputation
We're talking about reputation. On a fundamental level, our reputations are a signal of our qualities that make us worth associating with, and we tend to spend a large amount of time ruminating and even obsessing over what others think of us. In this episode, we explore why we need reputations as social creatures, understand why we can misinterpret others’ reputations, and think about what we can do to repair a bad reputation. We unpack: • Where our reputations come from • Why two people can view the same person so differently • The halo effect and how appearance biases our perception of others • How our reputations can change over time • Why we shouldn’t always believe what others say • How we can repair a bad reputation Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC8487743/ https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/ecology-of-minds/202509/what-makes-a-good-reputation https://www.researchgate.net/publication/349443219_The_halo_effect The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
43:17447. The psychology of PMOS/PCOS ft. Dr Hazel Wallace
I was recently diagnosed with PMOS, and with that came a lot of questions: why is my body like this, what caused it, will I be able to have kids, how can I fix it? There's a lot of information (and misinformation) online, so today I decided to sit down with an expert to ask all my burning questions on this condition. Watch on Netflix: HERE Dr Hazel Wallace is a medical doctor, registered associate nutritionist, women's health expert, author and founder of the platform, The Food Medic. In this episode, we discuss: The origins of PMOS/PCOS Why we had to change the PCOS name What causes PMOS and whether it's genetic How PMOS intersects with psychology and mental health The 5 things you should and shouldn't do if you have PMOS What actually helps How to deal with medical dismissal and misinformation Happy listening! Dr Hazel's book HERE Follow Dr Hazel HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
1:14:52446. The psychology of Stockholm Syndrome
The term “Stockholm Syndrome” is used to explain why someone might defend, protect, or feel attached to a person who has harmed them - but why does this happen? In this bonus episode, we explore where the term came from, some famous cases, and how the mind functions to keep us safe. We explore: • The 1973 bank robbery • Famous cases linked to Stockholm syndrome • The role of appeasement • How it relates to trauma bonding • Why dependence breeds attachment • How those experiencing Stockholm syndrome are supported Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1600-0447.2007.01112.x https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/20008066.2022.2161038 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1080/00048670701261178 See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
31:23445. Your guide to nervous system regulation
Tips for nervous system regulation are everywhere right now - from breathwork and cold plunges to conversations about burnout, anxiety, and trauma. But what does it actually mean to be regulated, and are we sometimes turning healing into another thing to obsess over? In this episode, we take a grounded, research-informed look at what your nervous system is really trying to do, why fight-or-flight is not the enemy, and how stress, trauma, lifestyle, and hypersensitivity can shape the way we feel in our bodies. We explore: • What the window of tolerance can teach us about overwhelm and shutdown • Why your nervous system is trying to protect you • The role of trauma, chronic stress, and lifestyle factors in dysregulation • What a regulated nervous system can actually feel like • How hypersensitivity can keep us stuck in symptom-monitoring • Why sleep, safety, nourishment, connection, and routine matter more than expensive wellness tools Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.31887/DCNS.2006.8.4/jbremner https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0005789413000191?via%3Dihub https://academic.oup.com/sleep/article/44/6/zsaa289/6053003 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTJAjx-AGAo See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
52:51444. The psychology of angel numbers
Angel numbers have a way of showing up just when we need them. 111 symbolises new beginnings. 444 means divine protection. Why does our mind pay such close attention to these numbers, what is the history, and what is their impact from a psychological standpoint? In today's episode, we break down: The ancient origins of angel numbers Why the founder of angel numbers now regrets them The meaning behind some of the most significant angel numbers Why our brain pays close attention to symbolism The emotional comfort of angel numbers Why people feel threatened by angel numbers When angel numbers can become harmful Happy listening! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:50443. How to be more interesting
I think we all instinctively know if we find someone interesting… or not. But how can we cultivate the skills of being interesting to others? In this episode, we break down the science behind what makes people interesting, talk about some easy things we can all do to tap into what already makes us unique, and focus on one of life’s greatest conversational hacks - learning how to be truly interested in others. We explore: • Why we all love interesting people • How ‘digital saturation’ is making us more bored, and boring • The importance of asking open-ended questions to unlock better conversations • Why being truly unique is a status symbol • The power of learning to talk to strangers • Why social skills are actually just social courage Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://tedbauer.medium.com/are-people-more-boring-now-98105e03e20c https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2009-12130-004 https://thevectorimpact.com/how-to-be-more-interesting/ The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
51:53442. The psychology of insecurity
If anyone tells you that they’re not even a little bit insecure, they’re lying, in denial, or both. It’s a fact of life that we all feel insecure at times - about how we look, behave, our achievements, and whether we are liked by others. In this episode, we examine the psychology behind common insecurities, recognise how we can be our own worst enemies, and consider the ways we can come to accept that we are all flawed, and might not actually need ‘fixing’. We unpack: • The surprising evolutionary benefits that come with insecurity • How our levels of insecurity change throughout our lives • The ‘liking gap’, and why we think others like us less than they do • How being insecure can feed insecurity, in a vicious cycle • Why people pleasing and over confidence are often signs of insecurity • How we can address insecurities that negatively impact our lives Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://www.bps.org.uk/research-digest/insecurity-leads-us-underestimate-how-much-others-us https://www.researchgate.net/publication/228079585_Self-Esteem_Development_Across_the_Lifespan https://www.centerforanxiety.org/what-is-hyper-independence-is-it-a-bad-thing/ The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
49:38The psychology of uncertainty
Uncertainty is the defining emotion of our 20s. Career paths, relationships, identity, purpose ... so much of this decade is marked by not knowing. Does that have to be as uncomfortable as we think it does? In today’s episode, we unpack the psychology of uncertainty: why our brains fear it, how it triggers anxiety and avoidance, and why trying to “figure it all out” might be doing more harm than good. We explore: The neuroscience behind our discomfort with the unknown Why perfectionism is often a mask for our fear of uncertainty The cultural myths that make us believe we need a step-by-step life plan How to assign meaning to uncertainty and build resilience through it Practical strategies to take action even when the future feels unclear If you've never felt more confused than you do now, and are unsure 'what's next', this episode is for you. Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
35:44The 20 biggest mistakes people make in their 20s
Over the past 6 months I've been asking people: what is the biggest mistake you made in your 20s? I've heard from over 5'000 people, some of them 21, some of them 80 and I have combined all their responses to make the ultimate list of the 20 biggest mistakes people make in their 20s, for the people, by the people. From love, to career, to finances, going to college, friendship, taking risks: today we talk through the most common responses we received and what we can learn from these moments and regrets. Listen now! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:44The psychology of highly sensitive people
The life of the highly sensitive person is often misunderstood. Highly sensitive aren't just people who cry too much or get overwhelmed, take things too personally: they actually take in so much of the world that it can be too much. They feel everything, from joy to sadness, so immediately and profoundly. They are also so in tune with the emotions of all those around them that sometimes it can be too much. Today we break down the psychology of the highly sensitive person, including: What are the core assessment criteria for identifying if you're highly sensitive? What causes someone to be highly sensitive? The genetic, personality, parental and temperment contribution The link between sensitivity, IQ, EQ and creativity + the gentle superpower of sensitive people Do highly sensitive people have more empathy? The link between neurodivergence and sensitivity How to explain your sensitivity to others How to make the world work for your gentle, feeling soul, and so much more! This episode is FULL of tips, research and studies. Listen now! The assessment: https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/ Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
46:48The psychology of confidence
You know when someone seems to breeze through life, can approach any social situation and challenge with such self-assured confidence? It seems innate - something they were born with. But what if that's not true? What if, instead of a fixed personal trait, confidence is actually a set of learnable abilities, a dynamic skill that anyone can cultivate, sharpen, and ultimately master? Today, we’re challenging the notion that confidence is a trait, and instead something you build. Things we discuss: Why confidence is dynamic and adaptable Self-efficacy as a driver of confidence How "growth mindsets" can revolutionise your approach to challenges and setbacks Understanding the locus of control to fuel or hinder your forward momentum Actionable strategies to build your confidence from the ground up If you’ve ever thought, “if only I was just born confident”, this episode is for you. Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
46:47441. The Freud Episode
Sigmund Freud is one of the most famous and contested names in psychology. Often reduced to couches, cigars, dreams, sex, and blaming everything on your mother, Freud’s real story is much more complicated. In this bonus episode, we take a look at who Freud actually was - his medical background, the development of his method, and why his views are so context specific. We explore: • The development of free association • The role of dreams and transference • Defence mechanisms and the unconscious • The structural model of the human psyche • Challenges to his theory • Freud's legacy: Anna and modern-day psychoanalysis Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK559106/ https://www.cureus.com/articles/303246-matters-of-the-mind-a-look-into-the-life-of-sigmund-freud#!/ https://www.freud.org.uk/2020/04/07/freud-at-home-sigmund-and-annas-studies/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/15293843/ The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
46:49440. 7 psychology tips to hack your productivity
Productivity advice often tells us to push harder, wake up earlier, and squeeze more out of every hour. But in this episode, we take a different approach. Instead of treating productivity like a test of willpower, we look at the psychology behind focus, procrastination, energy, motivation, and rest - and why working with your brain is usually more effective than trying to bully it into action. We explore 7 tips for productivity, including: • How small wins can create momentum • Why the hardest task often needs to come first • How to work with your natural energy patterns • Habit stacking for boring tasks • Why 20 focused minutes can be more useful than waiting for the perfect window • How ‘shoot your shot’ days can move you closer to the life you want • Why real rest is essential for sustainable productivity Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://psycnet.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2F0033-295X.84.2.191 https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/ejsp.674 https://www.ted.com/talks/saundra_dalton_smith_the_real_reason_why_we_are_tired_and_what_to_do_about_it The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
42:39439. How to chase your dreams, and when to slow down ft. Grace Beverley
TW: Discussions of miscarriage/pregnancy Grace Beverley is a founder, an entrepreneur, and a seasoned professional when it comes to pursuing the ideas your have, but also knowing when to slow down, recover from burnout and let yourself be vulnerable. In today's episode we discuss her journey from studying music at Oxford to launching over five businesses, and her next chapter as a parent. We talk about: The best career advice for your 20s How to start a business and her biggest lessons from early failures Why love should make you feel safe Her pregnancy loss story The importance of being vocal about what you believe in How to recover from burnout Listen now! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Grace on Instagram: @gracebeverley Shop TALA: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
1:00:34438. The secrets of therapy FROM a therapist ft. Dr Sandra Espinoza
We all know that therapy is amazing, in fact it’s life-changing for many people. But what does therapy actually do? And what makes a good therapist? In today’s episode we’re joined by Dr Sandra Espinoza, Associate Professor of the Couple and Family Therapy Program at Alliant University. Our discussion includes: Her journey into helping others Why the best therapists, go to therapy What to look for in your therapist Why we can’t just rely on our friends Our greatest misconceptions around therapy Why stigma and affordability continue to be the biggest barriers How Alliant University is leading the next generation of helpers and therapists to support their communities If you’ve ever considered therapy, been curious about therapy or want to be a therapist yourself, this is your ultimate guide. Follow Dr Espinoza: HERE Find out more about Alliant University: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
47:45437. The psychology behind feeling 'too much'
At some point in most of our lives, most of us have felt that we are ‘too much’. We might feel that we are too loud, have too many opinions, are too extroverted, too needy, or generally take up too much emotional ‘space’. In this episode, we explore what this feels like when it bleeds into our personal and professional lives, the impact of suppressing emotions upon our immune system, and look at some methods to unlearn and reconfigure our relationship with the ‘too much’ label. We unpack: • Why society likes to shame people who are confident and outspoken • The psychology of ‘Tall Poppy Syndrome’, and why women are particularly vulnerable • How being shamed and shut down as children makes us feel ‘too much’ later in life • The link between suppressing our emotions and our immune system • How we can unlearn the belief that we are ‘too much’ Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/why_are_confident_people_so_polarizing https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4212945/ https://www.instagram.com/p/DXo5rB3jtOe/?img_index=20&igsh=emNnMDNlZzFoeDZm The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
48:49436. The psychology of sibling rivalry
In many ways, sibling rivalry is an integral part of growing up in a multiple-child household – the arguments, the jealousy, the competition. But as we explore in this episode, those sibling dynamics often don’t stop in childhood, but actually following us into our 20s and adulthood, shaping how we see ourselves, relate to our families, and how we carry old roles. We explore: • Why a level of rivalry is developmentally expected • The evolutionary perspective on resource competition • The role of birth order and family roles • How sibling rivalry can transpire in adulthood • How to begin acknowledging and rewriting old roles Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://prevention.psu.edu/news/the-psychology-behind-sibling-rivalry/ https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10567-011-0104-5 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0192513X211064876 https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10826-016-0429-2 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
36:53435. The pain of outgrowing your old life
There comes a point in all of our lives where we realise we've outgrown who we used to be. Sometimes it happens all at once, due to a breakup, a move, a loss, or a major life change. Other times (most of the time), it's much quieter. As painful as that can feel, it's also one of the clearest signs that you're evolving. In this episode, we explore the psychology of outgrowing your old life, why change can feel so much like grief, and how to let go of the past without fearing the future. We explore: The psychology of liminality and the space between who you were and who you're becoming The seven stages of outgrowing your old life Why we cling to the past through nostalgia, the endowment effect and status quo bias When you know a chapter is over How to embrace change and build a future you're excited to grow into Happy listening! Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
33:43434. "I lost my brother at 16 to suicide, it shouldn't have happened" ft. Ben West
TW: Discussions of suicide. This week, I'm joined by mental health campaigner Ben West for one of the most moving conversations we've ever had on the show. At 18, Ben lost his brother to suicide. He has taken that experience and decided to change the lives of thousands, if not millions with his 'Reasons to Stay' campaign. In this episode we discuss: Why grief changes over time How to find purpose after unimaginable heartbreak The psychology of hope and why strangers can save lives What supporting someone through suicidal thoughts actually looks like Ben's incredible initiative, Reasons to Stay, and the millions of people it's already reached His two personal rules for protecting his own mental health Why healing isn't about 'moving on' but learning to carry what you've lost Watch on Netflix: HERE Preorder Ben's book: HERE Follow Ben: HERE If you need help, it is available. You are NEVER alone. Please find some further resources HERE. Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
1:02:05433. I'm ready to leave London
Giving you all an update on my life and my future in London. Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
33:26432. How to rebuild your attention span
Many of us feel that our attention spans are nothing like they used to be. So many of us can recall a time when we would read books for hours with ease, concentrate for hours, focus on a movie without going on our phone. But not any more. In this episode, we unpack the psychology behind our dwindling attention spans, via the consumption of endless content, task switching, lack of sleep and more. But there’s hope - we also look at practical ways that we can all work on retraining our brains towards healthier, more sustainable and enjoyable focus. We unpack: • Why our attention spans have been eroded, particularly over the last 20 years • How social media is designed to be like a slot machine • The impact of ‘sleep debt’ and our attention spans • Why the ‘switch-cost effect’ depletes our focus all the time • How we can retrain our brains to focus Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://time.com/6302294/why-you-cant-focus-anymore-and-what-to-do-about-it/ https://www.theguardian.com/science/2022/jan/02/attention-span-focus-screens-apps-smartphones-social-media https://thesciencesurvey.com/editorial/2024/02/12/the-problem-with-your-attention-span/ The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
52:58431. Why a boring life is beautiful
What might be seen as a ‘boring’ life is often just a life that wouldn’t be as popular on Instagram. In a world that glamorises chaos, spontaneity and constant stimulation, we need to create lives that truly nourish us, provide safety, and align with who we really are. In this episode, we explore the psychology behind why so many of us begin craving calm as we get older, why that can feel oddly threatening, and why slowing down may be one of the best things we can do for our brains. We explore: • Why many of us start craving a more manageable, peaceful life • Why this can create fear, guilt, or cognitive dissonance in our 20s • The pressure from social media to make youth look chaotic and exciting • The role of FOMO in feeling disconnected from our real preferences • Why our brains crave novelty • What a ‘boring’ life is actually made of: boundaries, routine, presence, and self-trust Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com Our favourite sources: https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/development-and-psychopathology/article/abs/differential-changes-in-impulsivity-and-sensation-seeking-and-the-escalation-of-substance-use-from-adolescence-to-early-adulthood/3542107D68176F9B55BC0A2DB212C701 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0747563213000800 https://www.nature.com/articles/nrn1052 https://www.science.org/doi/10.1126/science.1250830 The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
27:56430. The psychology of job interviews
When we go for a job interview, it can feel as if our entire existence is being judged. It can come down to the feeling of someone else getting to call the shots on whether we are intellectually competent at best, or personally desirable at worst. In this episode, we’ll explore why job interviews can feel so stressful, identify why positive first impressions are vital, and discuss some psychological hacks to help us nail them. We explore: • How job interviews trigger our need for social approval • The Yerkes-Dodson Law, or how excessive pressure can make us perform worse • Why we can’t trust our judgement about how an interview went • Why being likeable makes it more likely you’ll get hired • How easy psychological tricks can make us feel more confident Our favourite sources: https://www.catharticspacecounseling.com/blog/how-to-handle-uncertainty-without-losing-your-mindwww.researchgate.net/publication/313878823_The_importance_of_first_impressions_in_a_job_interview https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/beyond-stress-and-burnout/202206/the-effects-of-stress-when-interviewing Watch on Netflix: HERE Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
39:55429. The reality of chronic illness in your 20s ft. Nikki Lilly
Living with a chronic illness in your 20s can feel like carrying an invisible weight that nobody else can see. Beyond the hospital appointments, surgeries, medications and diagnoses, there is a hidden psychological burden: the anxiety, grief, uncertainty, identity struggles and resilience required to keep moving forward when your body feels beyond your control. In this week's episode, I sit down with content creator, advocate and broadcaster Nikki Lilly to discuss what it's really like growing up with a rare medical condition, navigating facial differences, online bullying, and building a meaningful life despite constant uncertainty. We discuss: The hidden psychological impact of chronic illness Medical trauma, PTSD and the long road to healing How chronic illness affects your relationship with your body Online bullying, discrimination and appearance-based judgment Plus her time at the Oscars and her vision for her future Happy listening! Watch on Netflix: HERE Listen to Live A Little: HERE Follow Lilly on Instagram: @nikkililly Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast Subscribe on Substack: @thepsychologyofyour20s For business: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com The Psychology of your 20s is not a substitute for professional mental health help. If you are struggling, distressed or require personalised advice, please reach out to your doctor or a licensed psychologist. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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